THE KING’S COURT

Name the last card & I will give you the lost keys to the unknown!!!

                                                           Today is the day that I, King, pass judgement on myself, for the betterment of myself, I am always the first to say something about others judging me, & now with my tarot journey coming to an end, the next to last thing I must do is, pass judgement on myself! My past I can’t complain about because I asked for whatever I got! First I will start with my childhood which was good if I may say so myself, grew-up in some projects called Eagan Homes on the west-side of Atlanta, graduated from Benjamin E Mays High school, this is where I got no education, I must admit that if it was not for football, & baseball I would have dropped out of school. At seventeen I joined the U.S Navy because my mother on graduation night told me that, I had 30 days to get out her house because, at the time I had not made any plans to go to college, & my job at Six Flags over Ga. could not take care of a man. My mom thinks I am bitter with her about that, & I am, but the truth is that I am bitter because she did not prepare me for life as a man. Being a single mother, I was the man of the house at age 13, but I never had to pay a bill. In the service is where I learned Karma Sutra, & after reading that book, that made me a loner, who did not like to be alone!! I’ve been married two times, with one biological child from my second marriage, seeing my son born was a eye opening experience. After the service I did what any young black male would do, being 22 years old, 4 years in the service, I decided that I was going to work for myself, so I started selling drugs, the money was good, being a military man the government had trained me to be a good hustler & thief. This is where I learned about life, & the company you keep!! I was bad for your health, I would laugh & joke with you, smoke your weed with you, & rob you before the blunt was out of rotation! I joined the service, but I was pure street!! After I had enough of the bull, I did some soul searching at age 28 & I found a better side of myself!! I found that I could be caring & loving!! Now this is around the time that I learned about women!!! You better believe that I am a late bloomer!! My first real girlfriend, at lease so I say because all those high school love affairs & during the time that I was in the service did’nt prepare me for the lessons that a hooker taught me! Her name was Crystal, & she was a  prostitute, a young pretty lady who showed me that I could have anything I want, believe me it was’nt a love affair by a long shot, but the lessons of love & life had my nose wide open, & the money did’nt hurt, she paid me well! After this I manage to get myself a couple of girlfriends! This is where I learned  the difference between sex & love making!! I stayed with them for a year, & we damn near had a threesome every weekend! Then I woke up & I got married the second time. I’m not saying I did’nt like it because even with dealing with me now, if you don’t like women we may have a problem later in the relationship! Getting married the second time taught me how to share, I married one of the most sharing women in Atlanta, she gave me the child that I wanted, & it was a Man-Child@!! (I want to thank my wife for my son)

  Today I work for a concret company, still married, but on the rocks, she don’t love who I am, so I let her alone!!~ I love to write, life is all about what you make it, & I am doing the best with what I got. I am still a loner, that loves to have fun, my son is 1 years old & he is my reason for living!! I read all the time, & religion seems to be my calling because, I like all the sacred texts. My mind is the most valued tool to me right-now, because I just learned how to use it!! God is what I’m looking for up there in the clouds of my thoughts. In search of that eternal god that I want to find & fall in love with!! Learning everyday how to love myself, today I suffer from low self esteem that i got from all my lost loves! Everybody seems to know what I am worth, I am just learning how to define myself!! I have a genuine lust for life, but what I have notice is that when people see that, they try to bring you down!! I won’t let anyone kill my spirit no-more! Today I’m good, I live through my God & not through man’s creatures!!

“Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the Law.'’
“There is no Law beyond Do what thou wilt.'’
“The word of the Law is Velhma.'’
Velhma–Thelema–means Will.

The Key to this Message is this word-Will. The first obvious meaning of this Law is confirmed by antithesis; “The word of Sin is Restriction.'’

Again: “Thou hast no right but to do thy will. Do that and no other shall say nay. For pure will, unassuaged of purpose, delivered from the lust of result, is every way perfect.'’

Take this carefully; it seems to imply a theory that if every man and every woman did his and her will–the true will–there would be no clashing. “Every man and every woman is a star,'’ and each star moves in an appointed path without interference. There is plenty of room for all; it is only disorder that creates confusion.

From these considerations it should be clear that “Do what thou wilt'’ does not mean “Do what you like.'’ It is the apotheosis of Freedom; but it is also the strictest possible bond.

Do what thou wilt–then do nothing else. Let nothing deflect thee from that austere and holy task. Liberty is absolute to do thy will; but seek to do any other thing whatever, and instantly obstacles must arise. Every act that is not in definite course of that one orbit is erratic, an hindrance. Will must not be two, but one.

Note further that this will is not only to be pure, that is, single, as explained above, but also “unassuaged of purpose.'’ This strange phrase must give us pause. It may mean that any purpose in the will would damp it; clearly the “lust of result'’ is a thing from which it must be delivered.

But the phrase may also be interpreted as if it read “with purpose unassuaged'’–i.e., with tireless energy. The conception is, therefore, of an eternal motion, infinite and unalterable. It is Nirvana, only dynamic instead of static–and this comes to the same thing in the end.

The obvious practical task of the magician is then to discover what his will really is, so that he may do it in this manner, and he can best accomplish this by the practices of Liber Thisarb (see Equinox I(7), p. 105) or such others as may from one time to another be appointed.

Thou must (1) Find out what is thy Will. (2) Do that Will with a) one-pointedness, (b) detachment, (c) peace.

Then, and then only, art thou in harmony with the Movement of Things, thy will part of, and therefore equal to, the Will of God. And since the will is but the dynamic aspect of the self, and since two different selves could not possess identical wills; then, if thy will be God’s will, Thou art That.

There is but one other word to explain. Elsewhere it is written– surely for our great comfort–“Love is the law, love under will.'’

This is to be taken as meaning that while Will is the Law, the nature of that Will is Love. But this Love is as it were a by-product of that Will; it does not contradict or supersede that Will; and if apparent contradiction should arise in any crisis, it is the Will that will guide us aright. Lo, while in The Book of the Law is much of Love, there is no word of Sentimentality. Hate itself is almost like Love! “As brothers fight ye!'’ All the manly races of the world understand this. The Love of Liber Legis is always bold, virile, even orgiastic. There is delicacy, but it is the delicacy of strength. Mighty and terrible and glorious as it is, however, it is but the pennon upon the sacred lance of Will, the damascened inscription upon the swords of the Knight-monks of Thelema.

Love is the law, love under will.

Kingtay I